Monday, October 29, 2012

Life is Good

The past few months have been really good with Lauren, and for her.  She has been os even for the most part.  Last week she had a bit of a melt down for a couple of days, but we got through that.  Mostly it happens when she refuses to talk and work through things.  But other than that things have been really good.  She has been helpful, and respectful and even been happy most of the time.  I hope she can see the value of it in her life.  I can.

She has been hanging out with her brothers more, which is really nice.  They have even been getting along for the most part.  I am proud of her.  She has been working a bunch and she really likes her job. She did talk to me about a concern she has the other day.  She feels that even though she has made some major changes and has been doing pretty good for about 3 months with only a few breakdowns, people still treat her as the old "whacko" Lauren.  No one trusts her yet, or gives her the benefit of the doubt.  She is right.  I tried to explain that a few months is great progress for her, and for us, but for most people a few months verses years of past experiences makes it difficult to put the past in the past.  If she continues she can gain back peoples trust, but that takes time.

She feels if no one gives her a chance how can she prove herself.  I understand her point of view, but I also understand others points of view as well.

I am pleased for her mostly and am glad she has found some joy and happiness in her life.  I love her and so want her to be happy and successful.  And I am enjoying, really enjoying my time with her.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Got a Job

Lauren went in for an interview the other day at Arby's and got the job.  She starts on Monday.  We are so pleased for her.  She also has another company interested in her.  It is called Otter Box and is a huge company. THey want to re-interview her on the 22nd of October.  They are opening a plant in Frederick, which as about 5 miles away and are hiring all new people.    If she happens to get that job it is the better of the two.  10 dollars an hour to begin with.  She seems to be okay.

I know she is still lonely, and I know she has those days where she is still caught in that whirlpool of emotions, but she has been handling it pretty well. WE haven't had any major outburst for about 3 months.  That is a really long time.  I think two things are contributing to this.  The first a biggest is a change in her medicines.  The new med she started in August really seems to help with her impulsiveness and mood swings.  Second I think we have given her a little more freedom to do things, even those things we don't approve of.  In so doing she has had to decide if it is really worth it.  Some things she is still making choices that will hurt her, but in a lot of ways she is choosing the better.

She is helping around the house, and pleasant for the most part.  I have enjoyed being with her, and my stress level has gone way down.   there are still things that I hope for her, but they aren't much different from my other kids which is a real blessing and real progress.  I dont know if she realizes how much I love her.  If I could I would take this from her.  I know we have been blessed by growth and understanding and compassion, and that she has learned how strong she can really be.  And I am grateful for those things, but I still would fix my baby if I could.  I really do pray for her and her future. She is in an okay place, and that is such a progress that I am thankful.  I know I am greedy.  But I am thankful and I am taking it one day at a time, and for right now  it is good.  Good for her, and for us, and I and thankful for that!  I hope she knows how please we are and how much we love her.